Sometimes as we go through life we forget to give time to the people closest to us. For whatever reason we put them aside whether it be for personal reasons or just due to life in general and where it takes us. It is all a juggling act and finding time for everything is sometimes a little difficult. I also think when something upsetting happens in your life and your feelings are hurt your family are the first ones you turn to.
I know for me that the latter is very true and more so now then ever I wanted to see my sister. I have never written about my siblings on the blog or spoken about them at all before. I think this is mainly because our lives are so different and I rarely see them. We have such different lives it is not always easy to meet up.
So, when I spoke to my sister and arranged to meet her I was so pleased about our plans. Since she has been at uni I have not actually been up to see her at all, except for once before this visit, but that was with family. I went up with both the children on our own to give her a visit and we had a fantastic time together.
I think we both really needed to see each other, we forgot about any worries we had and we laughed and enjoyed our day. It was nice to be with her and see her looking so well. She got to enjoy her niece and nephew and had the patience of a saint with both of them. Which was lovely. And I got to enjoy a day with a few of my favourite people in the whole world.
I love my family so much and I don’t tell them enough. I remember when I was a little girl one of my biggest fears was that I would one day leave home and be alone. I remember asking my mum if I could live with her forever. I remember cuddling my dad as a little girl, and just wishing for him to always be here with me. I was always so afraid of him one day not being here. As I have grown older I have taken for granted that both my parents are still strong and well, I have taken for granted I have two lovely sisters who I grew up with and still get to share my life with. I want us to keep nurturing our sisterly bond so that as we grow older it becomes stronger then ever.
These last few days have really shown me just how special family is. No matter what, no matter your faults, your grumpiness, they take you for who you are, they forgive you in a second, they love you no matter what and that is the most special gift in the world.
It is a reminder to me of how lucky I am to have such a strong family unit. To have both parents and my sisters here, I am grateful. No matter the struggles we have been through as a family, all the moving around countries we have done together, we are today stronger then ever, in our love and in our understanding of each other.
Although sometimes I feel worlds apart from each of them I know that in a blink of an eye, a text or a call we will be connected again and they will be there to support me in any way I need. That is love, that is family. For that, for all of it I feel so completely blessed.
When I kissed my sister goodbye today through the car window, I don’t think she realised what an effect today had on me, I don’t think she will ever know how much it meant to me to see her. For us to meet up. It meant an awful lot to me. I have tears rolling down my face tonight while I write this because it has brought to my attention so many past feelings.
In regards to the massive shift in our relationship when I had Sophia, and coming to terms with the ‘new’ relationship between the three of us. (I have two younger sisters) Before I had children we had worked out our little circle well. And then I had Sophia, while that was the best gift I was ever given and for them too becoming aunties, it also changed our relationship completely. I was swept away with late night feeds, sleepless nights and extreme grumpiness and there my sisters were not fully understanding the pressure I felt and all the hormones affecting me at the time, and it was hard on all three of us.
I know they love me and I love them too. But I mean in terms of having a deeper understanding of each other, even with friends, I don’t think that comes until you both go through the same thing. It is not until you have both experienced this same ‘thing’ that you can then finally have this greater understanding of the other person. I hope I make some sort of sense when I say this?
It brought back the memories of how my new life affected them as well. It altered the ‘circle’ we had created between us and it was hard on all three of us, I wasn’t their big sister anymore as I used to be, I was Sophia’s mum first and their big sister second. I think it was mainly to do with my age, and because I was quite young when I had Sophia, as a family we all went through the change. Looking back now it was the most pivotal moment in my life, in regards to everything. My parents, sisters, in laws, friends. In every single relationship I ever had, every single one of them was changed from that experience. Mostly every relationship was made better, especially the relationship I had with my parents. That became a glowing beacon of light from the moment I gave birth to Sophia. They have held the foundations of my heart so many times in the first few years of my motherhood journey, I could never thank them enough for that.
So this Brighton trip… again you see has been one of those pivotal moments, a moment in life that has been so needed and almost meant to happen in order for me to feel better about everything. Life has a funny way of working its self out. I wont always understand it, but at least I get to look back and have those, ‘ah I see why that happened’ moment. They are the best moments.
When we arrived in Brighton we picked up my sister and drove to park the car. We then took a lovely long walk into the town centre, stopping at an outdoor play area for the children first. They had so much fun jumping and playing. They also enjoyed the swings. The swings is one of their favourite things to do at the park!
We then headed off and walked through all the Brighton lanes. We found somewhere to eat. I cant remember what the cafe was called but I got a Halloumi wrap, my sister a falafel wrap and the kids some soup. We all enjoyed an Oreo cake to share after! Archie ate most of it!
We then headed to Brighton beach front, where we spent a good hour of our time lazying on the beach, the children cuddling their aunty.
Archie and I walked to the water front and threw some stones in the sea. He loves doing this. His granddad and dad showed him on our last trip to Brighton and he has never forgotten. As soon as he saw the beach he was telling me he needed to get the pebbles, nodding his head and smiling. It was so lovely to see him so excited.
You can see sophia completely covering herself up in my scarf bless her, she is just recovering from being very ill and the wind did not bode well with her at all. She was not happy about it so she stayed snuggled up for most of our time at the beach.
We did actually find a cuttle fish bone, I remember collecting these on the beach front when I was younger and giving them to my aunty Ronnie for her budgies, apparently it is good for their beaks. Archie was very fascinated by the cuttle fish bone.
Archie enjoyed playing with my scarf with his aunty Sha Sha and had the biggest smiles and giggles.
This is how we ended our day, with lots of love and happiness all round. We then made the long walk back to the car up the very steep hill. That was the hardest part of the day! At least it was good exercise.
It was so lovely to go and visit my sister. Even though it is over an hours journey, it wasn’t too bad considering. We cant wait to go visit her again. There is so much to do in Brighton and so much to see. We loved our trip!