Firstly I would like to wish you a very very Happy Mothers day! I hope you had a lovely day with your families.
Our weekend was so lovely. We have been meaning to have a weekend like this for a long time actually, just enjoying our home, hosting, laughing and all that jazz.
On Mothers Day we had my parents and my sisters to visit, it was lovely to have them all here at once not something we have done in a very long time. Both my parents work full time so everyone is busy with their own lives and that makes it a little difficult to get together when everyone is free.
It is a juggling act. Having family is oh so very wonderful, the support always appreciated, the understanding and love from everyone really keeps you going through it all. There for the smiles and there for the tears too.
I was spoilt by my lovely dad, he brought me the most beautiful flowers, lilies, my absolute favourite. (I drew them a lot in Art, and for one of my GCSE exams). My mum brought over some of Deliciously Ella’s homemade ginger biscuits, an absolute hit! I have these great people all around me bringing me flowers and biscuits! I am lucky to call them my family.
I was woken at 7 am sharp this mothers day with a: ‘mummy superio pip on Ipad’ (translation: superhero’s on iPad) I opened my groggy eyes and lifted my head off my pillow and there he was, my son all bright eyed and cheery, his little grin and dimple looking back at me. What a beautiful sight. I am so lucky I thought to myself and ignored the I wish I could sleep for a little longer voice in the back of my head. It was a fleeting thought and I am sure we all have them some days.
I am not that voice and so I put on my smile and opened my heart to this little boy asking me for ‘superio pip’ on his Ipad. Because seriously, no matter the time and how tired I am how lucky am I to be woken by his little voice and sweet smile? Those eyes get me every time.
I could feel warm feet on my legs under the duvet so I rolled over for a cuddle assuming it was my husband. But no it wasn’t. It was actually my 5 year old little Sophia, eyes closed, mouth open, curled in a peculiar position and snoring.
How fitting I thought I woke up to both my children in my bed on mothers day, one climbing on me and the other snoring next to me. And you know, I wouldn’t have it any other way. This is my life and I have fallen in love with it. I have allowed myself the joy of this day. I allow it day after day and the more I do the better it gets.
Archie kept chatting to me about the superheroes and soon Sophia was awake: ‘mummy, mummy I need to get you your mothers day card’ she said as soon as she sat up.
Both ran through the hall as fast as I had seen them run before, giggling with excitement, both wanting to bring me the beautiful cards they had made me at school. I was so excited to see them as both were in envelopes and I wasn’t allowed to open them until Mothers Day. It was a lovely surprise.
Archie had done hand prints and a flower for me which he was ever so proud of: ‘me did mummy, me’ he told me and I was beaming.
I then carefully opened Sophia’s envelope, which said: ‘dear mummy’ on it and I slowly pulled out the card. She had made a card with three beautiful flowers on the front, and inside the card she had written love from Sophia with a heart and a kiss she had drawn herself. That was really special.
She looked at me with eager anticipation to see what I had to say about her efforts: ‘Aw Sophia, just absolutely beautiful you have written so well and I love my heart, its the best heart in the world’ I told her, and it really was. It was the best heart in the world.
I just looked at the two of them their bodies pressed against the bed frame leaning into me. I reached out to both of them and hugged them: ‘thank you’ I said: ‘thank you for loving me so much, I love you both so much and I will treasure these cards forever.’ I gushed at them.
I looked at Sophia her long blonde hair now reaching her chest, it was crimped as she had asked for plaits the night before. I looked at Archie with his new hair cut, looking ever so big. And I was in heaven, motherhood heaven.
When you look at your babies and you feel it all the way through you, the pure sacred love of a mother, you know you have experienced the truth of life. You have experienced something so powerful it takes you away from anything else, from the material things you own and the physical life around you. It is just you and them and nothing else matters. Your love for them is all that matters in that moment, so strong it almost takes your breathe away.
I looked at my children and I was beyond grateful and I wanted life to be like this always. I wanted this day always. This moment, to be always. The love so strong between us, a bond truly unbreakable. A bond I have tried my hardest to nurture these past 5 years, a bond that doesn’t break when you haven’t had enough sleep or enough food, a bond that just keep filling up like a cup that continues to spill over, over and over again.
Today was beautiful in all these ways, but mainly because my children at 2 and 5 were so extremely excited to give me the beautiful mothers day cards they had especially made for me. They make me happy everyday, but to see their excitement in making me happy, makes every single day absolutely worth it.
I will continue to savour every moment that I can as they grow up. I will continue to do the very best I can to live every moment in the moment, to capture it to document it and to write it.
I am mum after all and all that I will take with me at the end of my time here are the memories we made together, the days we shared together and the love we grew and nurtured together. My love for you just keeps filling up like a cup that spills over, over and over again.